The back of the traffic sign was filled with a variety of technology, all familiar, nothing she couldn't handle. Her eyes scanned over the computer chips, the various wires, the switches and light bulbs. Taking a screwdriver she carefully tampered with the machine, careful not to mess up in messing it up. When she was done she put everything back in order to look the same as it did before, with a few minor adjustments. She walked away whistling happily, tossing her screwdriver in the air with a twirl or two before catching it again in the palm of her hand. Her car was parked just a few hundred feet away. She got in and waited, sipping on a freshly made brain slushie, staring at the traffic light as it changed colors over and over. Finally, someone was coming, a bicyclist so she would have to be fast. She pulled out of her parking spot on the side of the road, the light ahead of her was green, but the crosswalk sign said, "Do Cross" so the uncareful bicyclist didn't notice and didn't stop. Manacle laughter echoed inside of her vintage Pinto, she sped up and mowed right over the biker as he unknowingly jaywalked across the intersection. On collision she braked hard hoping to pin him under her car and back over him again, but she had been preparing for a walker and her calculations were off. The bike was crushed, but the biker flipped into the air and slammed into the back of her Pinto. There was a spark and the back of her car burst into flame.

"DAMN YOU, YOU CURSED SELF EXPLODING CAR!"

The vampiress ditched the ride, leaving the unconscious bicyclist to burn up with the car, dinner was ruined. As she ran away down the road cursing the poorly designed car she had bought for $1 from a discount auto dealer she tired to think of a way to salvage the night. Her eyes glinted towards Cafe Damari and her interest percolated.

"A nice cup of Joe would be nice right about now and I do have that meet-up with Seppuku to cash in on..."

She diverted her route towards the cafe and entered cautiously. Jauk wasn't fond of the owner, but was very fond of coffee shops. A lot of good memories for her in the city happened in a coffee shop she once inherited called The Dark Roost. She couldn't resist being in such a familiar and happy environment, hopefully the owner wouldn't be there this evening. The place smelled great on the inside and at the counter the menu looked well enough. She decided on the Irish blend because she liked her drinks with a little fight in them. Finding a table wasn't hard, which wasn't a problem for her, what vampire didn't like a more secluded hang out. It was certainly the owner's name that drove people away and far be it for her to not cash in on that. Her cellphone itched in her pocket as she waited for her drink, she pulled it out and went down her list of numbers passing Nemesis' on the way to Seppuku's and hoping she wouldn't find out about this.

*RING RING* "Seppuku? No, this isn't another prank call. Did you want to meet me at Cafe Damari? I thought we could hang out for a while and shoot the breeze. I would offer to pick you up, but my car just exploded and you know how that goes.... see ya soon or something!"

Jauk hit end on her phone and stared into her freshly made cup of Irish Joe. Her reflection stared back at her, half mangled from exerting her zombvamp self too much already this evening. As she stared down at it she could see bits of herself already starting to heal before a lump of goo dripped from her forehead into her drink with a small splash. She wiped it up with a napkin and sighed before taking a sip of her coffee and relaxing with a slouch in her seat.

Sirens blazed as the rescue vehicles sped down the street, their flickering lights dancing upon the tall buildings. Curious, the Cyberpire shifted in his spot - a rooftop overlooking the very road the trucks used - and stood to peer over the opposing edge. Without a second glance towards the corpse he'd been feasting on, he hopped off the roof and rounded the corner, spotting the commotion surrounding a burnt pile of metal.

He quietly scooted by the mess, his gaze flitting up to the traffic lights and then to the pedestrian crosswalk sign. Pausing at the corner, he stared at the burning car as the humans attempted to put it out. And that's when his phone vibrated within his pocket - why he still carried the blasted thing, he'll never know. Removing the Droid (funny), he noticed "one missed call" displayed on the screen. "Jauk," he mumbled grimly and proceeded to listen to whatever message the zombie decided to leave; "Seppuku? No, this isn't another prank call. Did you want to meet me at Cafe Damari? I thought we could hang out for a while and shoot the breeze. I would offer to pick you up, but my car just exploded and you know how that goes.... see ya soon or something!"

"Hm..." Seppuku pressed "end" and placed the phone back into his pocket, giving an amused click of his tongue as the rescue crew pulled a mangled bicycle from beneath the Pinto. "Of course it did."

The Cyberpire quickly became bored with the scene and continued on his way; To Café Damari... he mused. He’s seen the venue in passing, but never actually took the time to visit, and he’s only heard of the owner and observed her newspaper antics; Chiru was also “related” to her by marriage. Seppuku pursed his lips and locked those thoughts away for the time being. That was the advantage of having a computer for a brain; memory files could be locked, restored, or just all out deleted with a simple command.

Finally, the entrance to the cafe...
Seppuku stepped inside and spotted the gooey woman slouching at one of the tables. With a little sigh, he made his way over and eyed the seat across from her, making sure there wasn’t anything suspicious in or around the area. “Jauk,” he greeted casually, “How is my favorite zombie this evening?”

“Jauk,” he greeted casually, “How is my favorite zombie this evening?”

Looking up from her cup she saw the familiar face she was always so happy to see. She paused for a few silent and creepy seconds just staring at him with glossed over eyes. Just when she thought she'd known everyone in the city that was worth knowing she met Seppuku and it was refreshing. It reminded her of the first time she'd met Enid Black, who was much more tame then, it made Jauk feel new to the city again being excited about something she didn't know like the back of her hand. And she was his favorite zombie, 'Eat that ophelia!', she thought to herself whilst gripping a used napkin in her hand threateningly and finally smiling up at Seppuku at the same time.

"Great, glad to see you! I hope it was no trouble getting here, I may have created a bit of a traffic jam in route. You know fire and rescue teams... crash into and burn to a crisp one over zealous bike rider and they need 15 service vehicles blocking the road to stare at it. A bucket of water and a tow truck would have sufficed. They'll never be able to identify the guy anyway... I saw his teeth fly in ten different directions." She paused feeling a bit insecure suddenly. "I meant to do all that stuff, by the way. Everything went just according to plan. I'm pretty evil and causing traffic jams for little old ladies coming home from a late night of Bingo is my ammo. So.... if you like Bingo... you know, umm, you better watch out. Or maybe just... tell me in advance and I'll stay home and watch You've Got Mail again that night."

She was done talking for a while she was sure. She kicked out the seat opposite her, trying to be smooth and cool at the same time, but accidentally knocked it over making it look like she was just being a jerk for no reason. Rushing out of her seat to pick it back up and show him that was not her intent she knocked into the table and splattered coffee all over it and the floor around her, causing her to slip into the falling chair and impaling one of it's legs into her chest. Chair legs are pretty dull so that defiantly stung a bit, but she had to be cool, there was a way to recover from this. She stood up with the chair hanging out of her chest for a moment before it fell to the floor. Looking around the room calmly and she sudden had an idea. Smiling, she picked up the chair again and tossed it across the room and then flipped her table.

"This establishment is in violation of health code 6.3.4.99 Section Z article 12 and IT OFFENDS ME! We should go to somewhere else! Somewhere classier.... I was just waiting for you to get here before I left. Didn't want you wondering all over town on my account."

Quickly walking out of the Cafe, Jauk got to the sidewalk and started looking both ways down the road for any sign of some place open for business. There was a neon sign a block to the left that was on, but she couldn't read it from this far away. She motioned to Seppuku to follow her, flagging down a lone cab that was driving by at that exact convenient moment.

"You're gonna like this place better. I go here all the time, it's really awesome. Don't worry about you know, anything you might be worried about. I'm sure you're gonna like this place..."

She'd never been to the place, but if it was open for business that's all she asked for. As the cab drew closer her heart sank, it was not a restaurant or a bar or anything else that she wished it was. The big hot pink neon sign read Ding-a-Lings and appeared to be that male strip club that opened a few weeks ago. There was no turning back now, she had to pull this off or Seppuku would think she was dumb and unfriendable. The wound in her chest was taking a long while to heal and oozed a slimy green goo as it did. She kept scooping it up and tossing it out the cab window until it was time to get out.

"The sound system here is great....I'm thinking about buying the place. For my band. I play spoons, its pretty awesome."

Without waiting she walked towards the door flashing her id and nodding her head to the vampbot behind her, "He's with me..." The large black male, who resembled Mr T quite comically, grabbed her by her hair to stop her, ripping most of it off in the process. His face was disgusted as he held the mass of road kill in his hand covered in staples. Recently ophelia had given Jauk a bath with a Brillo pad and taken a bit too much hair out, but thought to fix it with staples and road kill. It worked well enough for Jauk until now. She snatched it out of his hand and placed it back on her head in a big heap, pulling a stapler from her purse and stapling it in its place. "Excuse you Sir! If you want hair extension you can come back from dead and buried against your sire's wishes and have her torture you yourself like everyone else! Dang. Lets go Seppuku, I'll buy you your first lap dance inside.."

He blinked slowly as the woman rambled on about the traffic accident she claimed to have caused on purpose. That, he didn't doubt. His gaze shifted to the chair as it was kicked back and to the floor. He never seen a zombie move so fast before in his life. Stepping aside, he watched the vampiress as she impaled herself rather clumsily onto the chair leg and over all made a proper mess of the place. "This establishment is in violation of health code 6.3.4.99 Section Z article 12 and IT OFFENDS ME! We should go to somewhere else! Somewhere classier.... I was just waiting for you to get here before I left. Didn't want you wondering all over town on my account." Seppuku scoffed and followed the woman outside.

"You're gonna like this place better. I go here all the time, it's really awesome. Don't worry about you know, anything you might be worried about. I'm sure you're gonna like this place..." He raised a single brow as he stepped into the cab, keeping a good distance away from Jauk as she tended to her wound. Even though he found her current state fascinating, he could deal without having to bathe in the substance oozing from her corpse.

As the cab approached their destination, he noticed the sign and frowned; "Ding-a-Lings?" He read aloud and glared at the zombie. "The sound system here is great....I'm thinking about buying the place. For my band. I play spoons, its pretty awesome."

"Right..."

Once he was out of the tight, smelly confines of the cab, he followed after Jauk and eyed the bouncer at the door. As he suspected, another entertaining episode occurred - this seemed to happen often when he accompanied the zombiepire. Seppuku inclined his head as she proceeded to staple her “hair piece” back into its rightful place.

"Excuse you Sir! If you want hair extension you can come back from dead and buried against your sire's wishes and have her torture you yourself like everyone else! Dang. Lets go Seppuku, I'll buy you your first lap dance inside.."

The Cyberpire shook his head and went inside. “I hate to disappoint you, Jauk, but I will not be accepting a... lap dance from anyone.” The fact that it was a male strip joint didn’t bother him - the female audience was enticing; he merely found the idea of a “lap dance” from another man (or woman) being rather unpleasant.

The Cyberpire shook his head and went inside. “I hate to disappoint you, Jauk, but I will not be accepting a... lap dance from anyone.”

The inside of the club catered to their core audience: women and gay men. The walls were lined with faux flamingo feathers and the ceiling as well as all of the surfaces otherwise was a metallic glittery silver. A mixture of steady strobe lights and pink lasers kept the room perfectly illuminated to thwart off visually impaired injuries, but dim enough to hid peg legs and hook hands on the male strippers. Mandy Moore's song Candy was blaring out of the sound system while a ripped and glistening man with eatable underwear was grinding a six foot candy cane against his family jewels. Similarly fitted men in tight jean shorts were dancing on the bar counter, pouring drinks behind the counter and walking around the room with trays of drinks. She knew nothing here would actually appeal to Seppuku, but there had to be something to entertain him without admitting a series of unnecessary lies led them to Ding-a-Lings. She scanned the room looking over the crowd of customers for inspiration and seeing only grabby handed women who looked well beyond their prime or self-absorbed gay men sitting idle waiting for people to notice how fabulous they were. Jauk was about to give up and turn to Seppuku to admit that perhaps they'd gotten off on the wrong foot and should leave when a well dress Paul Mitchell look alike in a black suit approached them.

"Welcome to the DL, we have a special lounge for special customers in the back. Follow me..."

Special customers? She looked herself over, yep, still wearing fitted black shorts and a plain white t-shirt with a goo covered hole through the chest. Her look made a voice scream out in the back of her head that this secret lounge was probably a trick and they were in fact going to toss her out back by the dumpsters without making a scene. It had been a long time since Jauk had listened to her voice of reason however and decided to go on ahead and follow the man anyway. Not without first waggling her eyebrows at Seppuku in a cocky, we are totally the shit around here, way. The suit stopped in front of a steel door and entered a series of numbers onto the keypad doorknob. He waited for a loud buzz and pushed it open. The door opened into what looked like an entirely other club. It wasn't as interesting as the front of the club, the walls were red with black lace woven into wild roses and vines covering it. Everything else was black with steel accents save for a large chandelier in the center of the room that was fashioned with glowing skulls. It looked either deliberately ironic or some stereotypical vampire's paradise.

"We're aware of the large scale vampire community in this city and we're happy to provide a place for you and your friends to relax and enjoy your evenings in peace. We have a variety of blood items on our menu donated from our dancers themselves. Tonight is on the house, just remember to take our card and pass it around...tell them to ask for Evan."

Evan scooted Jauk towards a cozy looking black leather booth where she noticed the table was fashioned to look like a coffin.That was it, she was officially mortified. She could handle impaling herself, making a destructive scene in a coffee shop over nothing, oozing goo in a taxi, and even a overly flamboyant male strip club, but this wanna be goth bar for vampires made her wanna be ill. It was time to come out and tell Seppuku the truth about the evening. She was very fond of him and was hoping that they'd get to know one another and he would think she was equally as cool. Regular outings, matching outfits, that sort of thing. Things just keep going wrong and she was trying to cover it all up, but things had gone too far and they ought to just go to a normal tavern in heart of the city just chill. On the heals of her feet she turned and faced Seppuku, looking over his charming features and choking down his always cooler than her aura. Her lips parted and her brief moment of reason was ashes in the wind.

"Pfft, I liked the other room better. Lets grab some spoons from the bartender and drop a phat beat for one of the dancers. I'm like the best beat boxer in RavenBlack city!"

It was a matter of minutes before Jauk was on stage with a microphone headset and spoons attempting to create comprehensive dance music. She keep looking over at Seppuku for validation, hoping for a thumbs up or an across the room air hug. The zombvamp was jamming so hard a couple of fingers flew off and either poked an eye or ruined a drink. Eventually both hands fell off and she had to smash the stems of the spoons into her wrists and play handless, but it was all for the greater good of the music. She didn't even notice that within an hour most of the customers had gone, many of whom were carried out vomiting and the ones that remained were so drunk they were tucking Jauk's falling body parts into the dancer's thongs. She left the stage after an encore performance of Freebird to have a seat next to Seppuku, everyone cheered excitedly and real music began to blare from the speakers again. Jauk pulled a flask of blood from her purse with the stubs of her arms and took a sip, offering some to robovamp after.

"It was a brain slushie, but it melted. So we haven't had much of a chance to talk this evening. Tell me about yourself, what roads lead you to being Nemesis' childer?"

As she spoke a bulb of flesh began to form out of her wrists as her hands began to grow back into place slowly. It would take a lot more brain slushie to fix it completely, but it was going.

It didn't take too long to track Jauk. Using the oogie boogie vampire powers would have been faster, but there was a great deal of satisfaction in just following the chaos left in the wake of the little zombie. Of course, once ophelia was past the debris of some kind of car fire, definitely smelling of Jauk shenanigans, it was only a matter of deduction to know where to go. Even from where she stood, the neon sign was, in ophelia's mind, akin to waving a jar of candy in front of a child.

As ophelia neared, she ignored the odd stares from what few people were milling about the side walk. They acted like they'd never seen a petite woman carrying what looked to be a rifle and wearing a riot helmet. Sending a scowl at the bouncer as he puffed out his chest in an attempt to look intimidating.

“Ding-A-Lings,” ophelia muttered, her left eye twitching in sync with the flashing of the sign. Stomping toward the entry, she raised a brow and smiled. “Damn woman hasn't been back TEN minutes and already she's been drained of blood once and had a night club named after her.” The man stared at her for a moment, looking almost as though he'd block her entrance. With some hesitation, the bouncer stepped aside, seemingly not inclined to get involved with whatever was about to happen. Standing on tip-toe, ophelia patted his cheek and said “You have to love a good human work ethic” before slipping into the dim interior. Moving with the speed gifted of her kind she managed to get inside with zero notice from anyone, located a set of back stairs and made her way up. The landing gave her a perfect view of the floor below.

ophelia surveyed the night club, her nose wrinkling disdainfully at the mostly naked men, the drunken patrons that smelled vaguely of sweat and cheap beer and the bad music that blared from the sound-system. She wasn't even going to think about the squealing women throwing themselves around like idiots. How in the hell Jauk had even found this place was a mystery. She probably owned it or something, and that would make the name of the place a given.

Slinging the gun from her shoulder she took out the ammunition from a small pouch at her waist. Initially, when she'd made the purchase, ophelia had the choice of getting a gun that she'd have to cock manually versus one that did it automatically. She chose the manual simply because she liked the soft, almost chuff chuff sound it made as it loaded each round. The ammunition she'd chosen to load with a bit of variety. No sense using ammunition if it looked the same after each strike, she'd thought to herself. Of course, what possessed her to buy it in the first place was going to remain one of the great mysteries.

As she rose, standing on the balcony ledge of the landing, ophelia surveyed the ground floor. She'd spotted Jauk almost immediately, looking armless and animated, sitting at a table with someone. The music changed and a lovely young man stepped onto the stage. “Oh goodie,” she said to Ralph, her gun, “An interpretive dance by a stripping skank-boy.” Taking aim, ophelia fired the first round, beaming in satisfaction as it popped the dancer in the navel. The pressure of the hit caused him to double over, and not surprisingly, as the boy-thing doubled over, howled and crab walked off the stage, he was replaced by a replica skank-boy with bleach blond hair. The dance went on.

Turning her attention to Jauk, she cocked the gun again and took aim through the scope. With a grin, ophelia fired, letting out a hoot as she met her mark. The squirrel ass on Jauk's forehead moved, turning bright red. Cocking she quickly fired once more, this time with an explosion of blue that spattered out, mingling with the red. Jumping from her hiding place, she stalked across the room, ignoring the sucking noises her feet made on the sticky floor. With each step she took aim and fired again. By the time she reached Jauk and her companion of choice, the little zombie looked like a Rainbow Bright doll that came from a Clive Barker movie.

Unfortunately, ophelia hadn't counted on the spatter so much, and when she'd turned surprised eyes at Seppuku she smiled sheepishly.

Pointing the rifle at the floor, she reached out and tried to brush some of the paint away from him only to drop her hand quickly when all she'd managed to do was smear the reds, blues, yellows and greens together.

“That's Jauks' fault” ophelia said quietly and with a nod. Flopping into an empty chair and flipping up the visor to her riot helmet, she gave Jauk a look filled with venomous affection.

“Long time no see kiddo. It's really rude to just throw yourself out of someones window while they're giving you a make-over you know.”

Special customers... He eyed Jauk as she gave him one of those looks. Special Ed, maybe... Following the human, Seppuku's mind began to wander; being surrounded by humans and the commotion his zombie companion created seemed to trigger something within his mind, something he dreaded. "We're aware of the large scale vampire community in this city and we're happy to provide a place for you and your friends to relax and enjoy your evenings in peace. We have a variety of blood items on our menu donated from our dancers themselves. Tonight is on the house, just remember to take our card and pass it around...tell them to ask for Evan." He cringed inwardly at the idea of ingesting the blood of those dancers. It left a bad taste on his tongue; it was almost as bad as the god awful room they were now occupying.

Returning his attention ahead of him, he was met with Jauk. Ah, dear, sweet, Jauk. She looked as though she were about to speak of something important - like him, perhaps; oh yes, Seppuku still had that ego of his. But those thoughts came crashing down when her voice finally rushed passed her lips: "Pfft, I liked the other room better. Lets grab some spoons from the bartender and drop a phat beat for one of the dancers. I'm like the best beat boxer in RavenBlack city!"

He pinched the bridge of his nose as the zombie rushed to the stage.
Jauk’s performance was most entertaining, especially the free gifts being handed out (no pun intended), and Seppuku was beginning to feel that familiar prickly feeling along his spine. He exhaled softly and occupied one of the many empty tables, waiting for his rotten companion to finish her little concert. And once she finally joined him, Seppuku was fighting tooth and nail to keep his glitch at bay.

"It was a brain slushie, but it melted. So we haven't had much of a chance to talk this evening. Tell me about yourself, what roads lead you to being Nemesis' childer?"

His gaze flitted from the woman’s face, down to the flask, and back again. That’s when his sensitive ears picked up a weapon of some sort; a firearm...

That was it.

Seppuku scooted back, grinning as paintball after paintball marred Jauk’s already unappealing visage - what is he thinking? It’s what’s on the inside that counts! And what do you know... the aggressor was none other than Jauk’s former sire, ophelia.

As the vampiress attempted to clean up the mess left over from the paintballs, the Cyberpire playfully tsk’d at the elder woman; “I half-expected Nemesis to walk through that door...” He then moved to the edge of his seat as if seeking out a place ophelia would hide certain things. “Did you bring me any gifts this time?”

After finishing off her brain slushie one of the barmen brought her a large margarita the size of a small fish bowl. It wasn't blood, but from time to time she liked to blend with the locals and do as the roman's do. Her face immersed into the glass and she was nearly up to her eyeballs in blueberry margarita as she sipped when oh so suddenly, as it usually goes, she had a case of brain freeze. It stung like someone had pelted her in the temple with a bebe gun, but it stung on both sides as if.... she felt the sides of her forehead... it had gone straight through her delicate skin.

The zombvamp brought her hand back in front of her to examine and saw it was covered in green, which wasn't really so strange as of late now that she was part zombie. It wasn't the same as her normal green goo however and then, of course, how did her head suddenly get shot? The thinking process was slow going these nights. She scratched her chin pondering as another paintball struck her in the shoulder and another in the neck. The blue one to the neck got stuck right in her throat and she coughed for a long while trying to hack it up only to find relief after some of the paint chunks became mangled enough to be swallowed. Jauk looked angrily in Seppuku's direction as if he had done it and was about to choke him into apologizing before realizing her hands hadn't quite grown all back yet. Her eyes scanned the table, she had enough fingers now to unscrew the salt shaker and toss it into his eyeballs... no PEPPER!

“That's Jauks' fault” ophelia said quietly and with a nod. Flopping into an empty chair and flipping up the visor to her riot helmet, she gave Jauk a look filled with venomous affection.

“Long time no see kiddo. It's really rude to just throw yourself out of someones window while they're giving you a make-over you know.”

She brushed her squirrel butt bangs to the side indignantly, finding it covered in blood and paint and left over squirrel poopie that had apparently been hiding in it before it was shot.

*sigh* "Hello my FORMER mother... not so much anymore... what are you doing here? Only cool people aloud. You're too old and crazy. Go sever some childer!" *mutters something about her beautiful hair getting messed up..*

As ophelia attempted to clean up the mess left over from the paintballs, the Cyberpire playfully tsk’d at the elder woman; “I half-expected Nemesis to walk through that door...” He then moved to the edge of his seat as if seeking out a place ophelia would hide certain things. “Did you bring me any gifts this time?”

Jauk glared with jealousy at both of them. If ophelia tried to make her the third wheel on her own night out she was gonna bite her something awful!!! It was always about ophelia. OPHELIA OPHELIA OPHELIA! Everybody just looooooooooved her. Oh, ophelia, what can I do for you? Oh, ophelia, can I marry you? Oh, ophelia, I know you've got 50 billion kajillion childer already but could I be your childer too and steal even MORE attention away from Jauk? She snarled as a warning that even with roadkill hair she was important too! Seppuku was her friend!

"FRIEND STEALER!"